He turned vodka shots into binoculars,
drawing chardonnay mountains from bottles
and rum seas across napkins
with whisky paths half hidden
behind liquor boats
bobbing along like corks
while their captains sang shanties
and their crews threw out sails,
white, crisp and smelling of salt
lime
and tequila.
Carol, Poetry is not my genre, but I liked this. I could see the table and bottles and napkins. Great job! Will be back. http://lilypupslife.wordpress.com/
The imagery is vivid and the concept is interesting … but my sense is that it’s not finished. I liked it, but then it stopped, which left me thinking, “So what?” What are you trying to accomplish here? Just a quick pen sketch – or something deeper?