NaPoWriMo 2016, Poetry
Comments 27

NaPoWriMo Day Twenty-Seven

Solitude

From pier-point we walked to the mountain slopes where the slate fell in slag-pile avalanches and the yellow grasses rippled against the breeze.

Your battered trainers barely survived the trip, so you carried them in one hand until the kissing gate, and left them hanging by their fraying laces.

With your footsteps just behind mine we scrambled for purchase, chasing thoughts like stray insects up the pitted pathways we’d walked more times than memory.

One by one they dropped away, pebbles tossed and bouncing, pinging out of sight and hearing until there wasn’t any further to climb.

Below there would be small slate rooftops and white wash houses with chocolate box roses around whorled glass windows, framing shuffling figures pottering from one day to the next.

Winded, panting, face shining and nose pink tipped you took my cheeks between your palms and pulled it close.

‘Just be here with me,’ you asked and for those moments I was. Together in the solitude of our mountain, barefoot and tired and palms stinging from falls and sharp stone.

I was alone with you.

Day Twenty-Seven’s prompt was to use long sentences in a poem. Since this was such an open prompt I decided to incorporate today’s Daily Post Prompt: Solitude.

This entry was posted in: NaPoWriMo 2016, Poetry

by

Carol Forrester is a twenty-three year old writer trying to be a better one. Don’t ask her what her hobbies are because the list doesn’t get much beyond, reading, writing and talking about the same. She has a 2:1 BA degree in history from Bath Spa University and various poems and stories scattered across the net. Her flash fiction story ‘Glorious Silence’ was named as River Ram Press’ short story of the month for August 2014 and her short story ‘A Visit From The Fortune Teller’ has been showcased on the literary site Ink Pantry’s. Most recently, her poem ‘Sunsets’ was featured on Eyes Plus Words, and her personal blog Writing and Works hosts a mass of writing from across the last five years. She has been lucky enough to write guest posts for sites such as Inky Tavern and Song of The Forlorn and is always open to writing more and hosting guest bloggers here on Writing and Works. With hopes of publishing a novel in the next five years and perhaps a collection or two of smaller works, Carol Forrester is nothing if not ambitious. Her writing tries to cover every theme in human life and a lot of her work pulls inspiration from her own eccentric family in the rural wonders of Shropshire life.

27 Comments

  1. What a beautiful shared moment. You used the long sentences, but they were not at all cumbersome as they can be. I loved this stanza:

    With your footsteps just behind mine we scrambled for purchase, chasing thoughts like stray insects up the pitted pathways we’d walked more times than memory.

  2. “Below there would be small slate rooftops and white wash houses with chocolate box roses around whorled glass windows, framing shuffling figures pottering from one day to the next.”
    Loved this visual. Lengthening the sentences sounds like a great challenge!

  3. Murtagh's Meadow says

    Beautiful – I seemed to walk right along with you. It reminded me of an old slat mine we visited once with friends in Wales.

  4. Pingback: NaPoWriMo – Day 28 – “What Could Be So Important?” by David Ellis | toofulltowrite (I've started so I'll finish)

  5. Really love the emotion you managed to work into this poem! And actually the long sentences worked quite effectively. A different technique is always fun to try.

Please take the time to tell me what you think, I love receiving feedback. :)

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