You set me off like a spinning top,
round and round,
arms all akimbo and empty jointed
while I spilled secrets like jelly beans.
You swallowed them
until you were full and I was empty,
hollow and aching,
but still
at long, long last.
I adore these Quadrille Mondays over at dVerse Poets Pub. Today’s prompt is to include the word ‘spill’ in your forty-four word Quadrille. So here is a little fun one to start off the evening and I think I might post a second in a little bit.
Oh the enchanting of a magician lasts only a while… the rest afterwards might be good.
Oh, Carol. This is perfection:
“while I spilled secrets like jelly beans.
You swallowed them” — WONDERFUL.
So well done.
I also like spilled secrets like jelly beans Carol.
“until you were full and I was empty,
hollow and aching,
but still
at long, long last.”
When to the point of trembling from holding the weight of the burden, you cannot help but acknowledge the relief of its release, even if you did not mean to let it go.
“… I spilled secrets like jelly beans.
You swallowed them
until you were full and I was empty…”
Okay, so I wasn’t the first to take note of these lines. That tells you how powerfully well you crafted this section. Great work.
Intense backstory here. Those lines quoted above are stellar.
Oh I really like this piece. It packs quite a punch in 44 words.
….I spilled secrets like jellybeans ,,, brilliant!
this whole poem is super
I can just hear those secrets hitting the floor in brilliant colors and being swallowed. Excellent work in this.
Ah, the story of so many who fall under the spell of another.
I love your quadrille, Carol, especially the phrase ‘I spilled secrets like jelly beans’!
Very creative imagery…swallowing secrets like jellybeans…wow. I like that.
I love the idea of spinning round and round, and spilling secrets like jelly beans falling out of a candy machine….would that we could put a penny in and learn what someone is thinking — have their thoughts slide right out on a little fortune-cookie-piece of paper! Wouldn’t that be a trick!
Very nice!
Yes, I’m with the rest of them on the jelly beans issue – lovely visual image.
Spinning secreTs oFF
Free Breeze Spilling
liGht and DaRk aliKe
open mindED
heArTed
SpiriTED
talk
FReED..:)
Frenetic, and beautifully penned.
Thank you. 🙂
Very well written! 🙂
I love it.
The emptiness is what hit me .. I feel sadness, but is could just be me