Scribbles From Life
Comments 2

Reviewers Wanted!

Edwin and Sammy hunt monsters. They’ve been at it for centuries and they’re not planning on stopping any time soon.

Except things are stirring. Things that haven’t stirred in a long, long, long time and it’s got a certain zombie with a hording problem all jumpy, and he wants Edwin and Sammy to fix it.

They just have to find out what it is.

A few months ago I started working on Solitary Creatures. It’s set in the modern day and the first four parts are up on the site starting here. This April I will be using the story line for my CampNaNoWriMo project so it will begin to feature a lot more heavily on the site.

What I’m looking for is readers who will be willing to give it a read and let me know what they think. I’m looking for honest, constructive feedback so if you don’t like it and want to tell me so, then that’s fine too.

If you’re interested then you can click the link above and it will take you to the first chapter or you can get to the story through the menu at the top of the site. I’ve included a sneak peak below to show you what you’re getting into.

‘Well he was a stubborn one wasn’t he!’ Edwin dragged his hands along his jeans to wipe off the worst of the blood. ‘I swear, it was like he didn’t want to die.’

Sammy mumbled something beneath his breath and continued to throw body part into the pit they’d dug just outside the farm boundary where the boggy peat land crept in and made the ground wet and dangerous.

The pair were sweating but Edwin was still grinning. It had been his idea to go after the vampire, his idea, not Sammy’s.

‘You sure you got all the pieces?’ he asked. He left Sammy unloading the truck and opened the passenger door to fish around in the glove box. Between the dead torch and a road map thirty years out of date he found the half smoked pack of cigarettes and tapped one out into his palm. ‘Don’t want to risk someone coming across some stray bit of Mr Baldy here and kicking up trouble.’

The end of the cigarette glowed red and he sucked in a lungful of smoke.

‘I got ’em all,’ Sammy muttered. ‘This isn’t the first time remember.’ He hurled the last segment of Mr Baldy into the hole and mopped his face with a bit of rag from his back pocket. ‘Your turn.’

Edwin nodded once and leaving the cigarette pinched between his teeth raised his hands up in front of him. The earth groaned and wavered. Frowning, Edwin adjusted his stance and shook out his arms. The earth groaned again, but this time the hole snapped shut with a wet squelch, leaving no trace of the grave at all.

‘You’re getting rusty. You didn’t even have to raise your hand two years ago.’

‘Yeah well, things change,’ snapped Edwin. ‘At least I’m more use that you.’

Solitary Creatures: Part One

This entry was posted in: Scribbles From Life

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Carol Forrester is a twenty-three year old writer trying to be a better one. Don’t ask her what her hobbies are because the list doesn’t get much beyond, reading, writing and talking about the same. She has a 2:1 BA degree in history from Bath Spa University and various poems and stories scattered across the net. Her flash fiction story ‘Glorious Silence’ was named as River Ram Press’ short story of the month for August 2014 and her short story ‘A Visit From The Fortune Teller’ has been showcased on the literary site Ink Pantry’s. Most recently, her poem ‘Sunsets’ was featured on Eyes Plus Words, and her personal blog Writing and Works hosts a mass of writing from across the last five years. She has been lucky enough to write guest posts for sites such as Inky Tavern and Song of The Forlorn and is always open to writing more and hosting guest bloggers here on Writing and Works. With hopes of publishing a novel in the next five years and perhaps a collection or two of smaller works, Carol Forrester is nothing if not ambitious. Her writing tries to cover every theme in human life and a lot of her work pulls inspiration from her own eccentric family in the rural wonders of Shropshire life.

2 Comments

  1. Hi,
    You asked for reviews?
    Hope this is the right place.

    I read the current four chapters of ‘Solitary Creatures’. Certainly did the initial job and hooked me in. I want to know more about Edwin and Sammy – relationship, how come they do what they do, who or what they are. Your blurb suggests they’ve been around a very long time, not sure that came across very clearly so far in the story – there’s time to explore that. The motivation for working with/for Syms is hinted at and leaves a nice tension waiting to be resolved. What on earth do they get out of it? That’s the question you want us asking of course!

    Zombies/Syms – I have a problem with zombies – I’m an old git and grew up with the idea of the original Voodoo/Candomble development of West African Vodun and zombies as either corpses re-animated by powerful priests or victims under the influence of puffer fish based neurotoxins for nefarious religious purposes. The post ‘Night of the Living Dead’ variety with unspecified/unstructured causes leave me cold (they strike me as a cypher for ‘the other’ and God knows we have enough of that around at the moment without hijacking Haitian folk myth). However that is my problem – they certainly seem to be popular, although possibly a little past their sell by date in more ways than one? You haven’t of course identified him as such in the story – the reference is in the blurb, so perhaps my doubts are unfounded. As written he works very well so far.

    I like the idea of a Mr Big monster with a hoarding problem though.

    As for a novel based on it, definitely– lots of avenues of development opened up already. The problem for me trying to write it would be which ones to follow without turning it into an encyclopaedia of the supernatural. You will no doubt resist this. Plenty of time for that in the sequels!

    Pace – you have covered a lot of ground already. Dialogue and internalised commentary do a lot of the work. Is that sustainable for the length of a novel or do some scenes need more descriptive narrative? I don’t know – just a question. Depends on your story arc. Do you have a definite idea of that or is that one of the things you are developing for/in April?
    If that isn’t the kind of thing you were looking for – sorry – feel free to delete/edit/bin as required!

    Bottom line is: engrossing, I read what you’ve written so far a couple of times and would happily buy the novel based on what is there. Keep going and best wishes for the April project.
    Guy.

    • Hi, thank you for such a detailed review. I think you’re right about the pace and I’ve been debating turning it into a series of shorter stories, each maybe eight-ten parts.
      I haven’t planned out the arc very very, that’s something I plan to do over the next few weeks before April and CampNaNoWrimo.
      I’m really happy to hear you enjoyed it, thanks for the lovely comments.

Please take the time to tell me what you think, I love receiving feedback. :)

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