George’s paper ends
somewhere before the sports section.
Instead he finds the kitchen table
still set for breakfast,
his wife’s hips wedged
between cooker and counter
as she swipes for the pepper
in a cupboard he looked in once
in search of a meter
when the gas man came calling
three years back.
Down the road the lad are out,
pushbikes and trousers in socks
with grease marks on calves,
as the milkman makes his rounds,
two streets shy of his bed
and the man he’s come home to
for the past twenty years,
no matter what their families said.
Behind the local is the lorry
loading empties from the night before,
when Josie and Keith picked a date
and each other,
and the pub turned to party
as the village poured out of their homes
to drink dry the bar
with the excuse of a reason to celebrate.
Edna will make comment
on the noise through her window
of metal kegs on cobbled lanes
to the man half her age
with his head still on her pillow
and his arm round her waist.
On the other side of town
his wife is starting breakfast
in the hopes his shift will end soon
and the manager will choose
to switch him to day work
so her bed won’t feel as empty
as it did last night
when she held his shirt to her face
and tried to remember
the last time he’d kissed her.
The sports section is by the toaster
next to yesterday’s post
and a card from George’s nephew
sending best wishes from New York.
In his hand is the pepper,
from the cupboard that does not hold the meter,
and on his lips are three words
he can’t quite decide how to say.
I’m tying two prompts together tonight with this poem. The NaPoWriMo prompt was to write a poem of simultaneity in which multiple things are happening at once and the dVerse Poets Pub was to write a poem about a town, city or village. I hope it’s okay with tonight’s host that I made up a town.
This is fabulous, Carol, so multifaceted, well characterised and detailed. I love the images in the lines:
‘Down the road the lad are out,
pushbikes and trousers in socks
with grease marks on calves’
and
‘… the noise through her window
of metal kegs on cobbled lanes’.
Thanks Kim. I wasn’t sure about it when I finished, I started to worry it wasn’t ‘poetic’ enough. I’m glad you liked it though, that makes me feel better.
It reminds me a bit of The Beatles’ ‘Penny Lane’!
I love that you made up a town, and a marvelous one it is! I read this out loud and was flooded with every emotion and then you read it out loud and I drown in it. Simply astounding writing! Characters and images and words that love each other. AND you blended it with the GloPo prompt with flair. Glad you joined in, Carol!
Thank you Jilly, that’s really lovely to hear. 🙂
This isn’t a poem, it’s a three volume novel. It actually put me in mind of Under Milk Wood – the quirky cast of characters and the glimpses of their fully rounded lives.
I’ve not heard of that, I’ll have to look it up. I’m glad you liked the characters, they were really fun to write.
This is wonderfully written – I agree with sarahsouthwest – you’ve got the makings of 3 novels!
Ha, I’d be happy if I could finish the one I’m working on at the moment. 🙂
Nice description of an urban morning that could be anywhere.
That was an engaging write!
Awesome interpretation! I love how tangible it all was, I could see it happening before my eyes–using these traditional and easy-to-access ideas, we can all understand it. Well done!
Loved all your word pictures! Especially the milk man delivering milk house to house. I had a milk man when I was very young. Glass bottles on the porch with cardboard tabs and aluminum foil over it all. You took me down memory lane on this one.
dwight
I could imagine every scene and each character. You did well here. Loved it !
Thank you very much Vivian, it was a fun poem to write and I got to look at character more so than I normally do in my poetry which was nice.
Very good! I played the audio while I read….it was great because your inflections gave it more life😊
My asthma started playing up as I recorded that so trying to get a recording without it sounding like I was running out of air was a little tricky.
Didn’t even notice!☺
Oh…..I WISH you could be sitting here to here the explosive, out-loud “oh” that escaped my lips when I got to the end of this post. This is just absolutely amazing! You’ve introduced me to a town….to the people who really are the town. The lad who goes home to the man, no matter what their family says………the cupboard with a meter and then ending with the pepper from the cupboard without a meter………hips and pubs and personal names. This is truly truly a wonderful response to the prompt! I ENJOYED this so much! 🙂
Love it! Flows like a screenplay, describe shots of a motley cast of characters going through their daily life dramas. Great energy and piercing imagery!
Thank you very much, I really enjoyed writing it so I’m glad so see readers enjoying it so much.